Polls close in California in
Polls closed
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8:00 PM PT · Tuesday, November 3rd. Hats, however, remain undecided.
Compare the Candidates
Two parties. Two hats. One deeply important decision about your head.
The Donkey Party
Stubborn as an ass. Parties like one too.
The Elephant Party
Life of the party. Death of the dance floor.
Open Bar. Close the deficit later.
Champagne tastes. Beer budget.
Hee-haw is protected speech.
Trumpeting after midnight is a constitutional right.
Kicks first. Questions later.
The elephant in the room owns the room.
Hat stays on.
Hat stays on.
$6 Off your order when you choose the Donkey Party.
FREE Shipping on your order when you choose the Elephant Party.
Can't decide? Vote a split ticket. Pre-order both.
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